The Best of USA; Customer Service

It takes up to five times more money to sell to a new customer than to get a current customer to make another purchase.

Recognizing the many American business values and practices is an important step to building a successful business. If you've lived long enough in the US, you will realize that one of the core values of the service industry is customer service.

My first encounter with effective customer service was when I moved to the US and went into an Ultimate Electronics store in search of a TV. Even though I did not make the purchase, I will never forget the associate who offered me a bottle of chilled water when I walked into the store on that hot and humid summer afternoon. His polite offer hit me like a lightning sending me into a state of confusion thinking I had walked into a restaurant.

For the many years I've lived abroad, I know no other business that comes close to the excellent customer service provided by Bank of America (Voted #2 bank in customer satisfaction by ACSI). I would rate them number one on all business fronts (internet, walk-in and telephone services). This is a firm that has spared no expenses when it comes to dealing with their clients.

To many people, especially in Kenya, going to the bank has never been a pleasant experience. Not so with Bank of America. When you walk into their premises you are met by a greeter who proceeds to direct you to the right teller. In their banking halls, they provide hot beverages, water and a choice of cookies, cakes and candy. Clients who don’t want to stand in line can be served as they wait on the lounge chairs provided. Also provided are copies of best selling business books, local dailies and other financial magazines or newspapers for your reading. What’s more, they have readily available cubicles for private consultations unlike many other banks that only provide a desk service.

It's easy not to appreciate their online banking especially if you’ve never used other banks websites. Their ‘My Portfolio’ feature allows you to automatically aggregate your other online financial accounts. Online banking also allows you to access an array of account services on their portal. From the comfort of your PC, you can manage most customer service requests from their website. Depending on the accounts you hold, almost 20 kinds of services in addition to e-billing and free bill pay are available. For that reason, the only time I get to go to the bank is to deposit a check or withdraw large sums of money.

BoA clearly values their clients and has gone the extra mile to attract new clients and also to retain their current ones. If only many other businesses could also recognize that a satisfied customer means a loyal customer and increased revenues.

Keeping Up With The Jones'

Are you willing to work for 40 years at a job you hate so that you can buy lots of stuff?

Are you willing to pay more for clothing if it has a designer logo on it?

Would you rather be shopping right now?

If you answered yes to any of the above questions read on.

From the Great State to the Golden State, Red states and Blue states alike, and from Coast-to-Coast, a new epidemic is sweeping across America. The American Dream has been replaced by Affluenza, a socially transmitted epidemic of stress, overwork, waste and indebtedness that is characterized by a bloated, sluggish and unfulfilled feeling resulting from the pursuit of happiness.

The once famous American Dream of having a loving family, sedan, satisfying job and a place to call your own is no more thanks to the culture of consumerism and materialism best known as economic progress. Due to advances in marketing, advertising and the mass media, keeping up with the Jones' has now become a national past time. High-end SUVs like Cadillac Escalade, 4000 sq. ft. plus houses, 60" plasma HDTVs, Rolex's and tens of thousands of dollars in credit card debt have become the symbols of success.

The irony is that frugality and thriftiness are portrayed as a life of misery even with rising levels of depression, envy, over-consumption and spiritual emptiness in the western nations. Rather than live a life of contentment, we have reached a state where we can't differentiate between our needs and wants. Luxurious items are touted as basic necessities that we cannot do without. There's no telling whether modern man will overcome affluenza which is fast spreading to the remotest parts of the world and becoming the norm rather than an exception among communities.


PS.
I'm off to Chicago's Magnificent Mile for some shop-till-I'm-broke retail therapy. Here's to economic growth and prosperity. Cheers!

Never Try To Catch a Falling Knife

When asked “What will the stock market do?” J.P. Morgan the legendary banker replied “It will fluctuate.”

Of all the stock market predictions that we read or hear in the news, J.P Morgan's reply captures the future performance of the stock markets. While no one can accurately predict whether stocks prices will appreciate or decline, using simple technical analysis (TA) tools can save you the agony of loosing your money. Unfortunately, TA relies on the use of historical data and is therefore not a leading indicator.

The simplest way to get started is using the stock price moving averages (MA). I prefer the 200d, 50d and 10d MAs to determine the trend of a stock. From the above chart, the combination of the MAs show that Sandisk is in a bear-mode. This trend is confirmed by the Relative Strength Indicator (RSI) which is below 50% and the preceding high volume sell-offs. A look at the On-Balance-Volume indicator (not shown) indicates that smart money is leaving the stock in droves. While I would not be a buyer of Sandisk at this point based on the above information, combining TA with fundamentals and the market outlook for the semi-conductors can give a clearer indication whether to buy, hold or sell the stock.

TA not only provides information regarding the trend of a stock but it can be used to determine entry and exit points in a position. Unfortunately, the noise associated with trends can lead to false indications. I prefer the crossovers on the 50d MA to identify reversals and confirmation using the reduced lag time Exponential MAs (EMA) which are more weighted to recent stock prices. As a passive investor, my use of TA is limited to identifying buying or selling opportunities rather than for predicting the future. When it comes to buying stocks, knowing what or when not to buy is just as important as knowing what or when to buy.

Give To Caesar That Which Is Caesar’s

This year marked the first time that I filed my own taxes. Like many other's I have relied on a tax professional to file my taxes. After evaluating the different softwares I settled for TurboTax Premier. Considering that most CPA's charge more than $100 and the complexity of my taxes, forking out $75 for the software was a fair bargain.

While most people loath filing taxes, it was a good opportunity for me to take stock of my financials and also to budget for the coming months. What I liked most about TurboTax was the ability to evaluate how each item on my tax return affected my tax burden. Even though the software comes with a tax planning tool, by fudging my entries I got a better understanding of the US tax codes.

TurboTax also allows you to compare your tax returns against similar US tax returns in your Adjusted Gross Income (AGI) range. The comparison is much simplified compared to the yearly tables published by the IRS. Although the statistics are for 2004, they were altogether interesting considering I earned more in 2004 than I did in 2006.

Income, Deductions & Credits	US Average	My Comments
Salaries and Wages	$120,341	Wages are greater than business income
Taxable Interest	$2,341	Savings, CDs, bonds
Tax-exempt interest	$10,485	Municipal, state and government bonds
Dividends	$4,695	Stocks and mutual funds
Business Income	$40,829	I'd rather be employed
Business Loss	-$8,201	Very impressive
Capital Gain	$24,944	This is huge. Stock market gains?
Capital Loss	-$2,424	Not bad in comparison to the dot com bubble?
Rent and Royalty Income	$15,180	I prefer this to self-employment. Less hustling
Rent and Royalty Loss	-$9,109	Not a good year for some landlords
Medical and Dental Expenses	$10,541	Are we that sick? Or is it expensive to fall ill?
Taxes Paid	$11,311	Not much, includes state and property taxes
Interest Paid Deductions	$11,764	Mostly mortgage interest
Charity Contributions	$4,437	I expected more generosity
Total Itemized Deductions	$28,143	This is what I like about the US tax code
Child-care Credit	$571	Not much, but it's better than nothing
Adjusted Gross Income	$142,266	This is 238% of US GDP per capita
Taxable Income (TI)	$106,652	5% of income ($7,471) is not taxed :)
Alternative Minimum Tax (AMT)	$1,991	More people paying AMT due to wage inflation
Total Tax Liability	$19,437	18% of TI. I paid 7%, nice..... :)

TurboTax does not mention the average federal tax refund though I've read elsewhere that it was approximately $2300 in 2004. From these numbers, the tax liability is more than the taxes paid, so it's safe to assume that most people mailed their returns with a check (average $8,126). With my taxes filed, the bigger problem is figuring out how i will best use my tax refunds.

Desperate Housewives: Season Finale!

The ndogo ndogo's in Nairobi have officially been put on notice. Kenyan wives plagued with unfaithful husbands can now reclaim the pole position in their marriages. Thanks to Mrs Getrude Mungai, frustrated wives are now learning how to stop their husbands from their wandering ways. The first ever school of femininity is offering a mixture of lessons that will ensure husbands remain captivated to their wives. Mrs Mungai's school is aimed at getting wives in control of their marriages rather than living in the shadows of extra-marital affairs.

In addition to offering strip tease and pole dancing, soon-to-be-married women and married women are offered an array of services. Among the services provided are bridal showers, culinary lessons, catering, therapeutic massage and toning, dancing lessons, wedding planning and sexual intimacy lessons. Tetezzo also sells products aimed at stirring up the romance in marriages.

Love Brewed in an African Pot

With Kamangu winning his court case, here is his morning routine once his wife is returned home by the court:

Act 1, Scene 1 (Somewhere in Gachie).


Kamangu: Nyina wa Ndimu nikii uikaririe chai uguo? Hee ngam'buti ya customer ndirachinaga ira na iroywo thaa igiri. (Mother of Ndimu, why is the tea taking so long? I have a customer's gumboot that I was repairing that is to be collected by 8 AM).

Nyina wa Ndimu: Reke chai uke. (I am bringing the tea).

Kamangu: Na-ira niuranegenaga muno utuku. Nu u urenda ashindwe? Maruwa maigoti mahete rutha rwagukoma nawe anytime! Niukweda njooke igotine ndimere ndiraigania? (You were making so much noise last night. Who is it that you were referring to as 'Shindwe'? I have the court injuction which gives me my rights to you anytime. Do you want me to report you to the court for contempt?

Nyina wa Ndimu: Urakinungaga njohi muno nginya roho wakwa ukenda kuriyo. (You were smelling of too much beer, it made me want to puke).

Kamangu: Ona ndiguthiie wira! Nituchoke uriri, maya marua maria mahete rutha! (I have decided not to go to work. Lets go back to bed (Waving the court injunction).

Nyina wa Ndimu: Moko mau maku ni momu muno, wanyita nyondo iratura muthenya wothe. (Your hands are too hard, when you hold my breasts, they ache the whole day).

Kamangu: Ok. Umuthi iratu ti nyinge; thaa ikumi ndihaha ngore uhana ta urathii guthambira. (If that is the case, I do not have much work today. I will be here at 4 pm. I better find you very clean) or more like ".... I will be here at 4 pm. I better find you looking like you are going for a swim" (Meaning: I better get you naked).

Nyina wa Ndimu: (ASIDE)................Oh my God, ino ngoma twarutanire ku! (Where did I get this devil from?).

Kamangu: Ndimu? Ng'ombe niuikiirie thaara? (Ndimu-Wanjiru's son- Have you fed the cattle?).

Ndimu: Mimi I am going back to America.

Kamangu: America ni cuguo kana ni nyukwa? Ukame na uhe gacau iriia o riu! (This is a swear phrase which literally means, Is America your grandmother or your mother? Go milk the cow and then feed its calf).

To be continued............. (Author unknown).

War on Terror: Operation Fool Me Twice

'Fool me once, shame on..., shame on you. Fool me and you can't get fooled again' or so does President George W. Bush think.

No matter what anybody says about President Bush, you have to give it up to him. He has a way of getting things done, the 'high way' if I might add. Thanks to 9/11, the White House has been able to push its own program in the name of national security.

Guantanamo Bay? No problem. NSA surveillance program? No problem. Invade Iraq? No problem. Secret CIA prisons? No problem. Attack Iran? What problem?

With intelligence reports indicating that Iran is aiding the insurgency in Iraq and their insistence on developing a nuclear program, it is looking very likely that the US will have to step in to 'restore' order in the Middle East. The discovery of Iranian made bombs in Iraq being used in attacks on US troops stationed in Iraq has given the White House ammunition to go for Iran. The Democrats majority in both the House and the Senate does not seem to be enough of a reason for the US to launch an attack on Iran despite their opposition towards the war in Iraq. It remains to be seen whether 'Operation Fool Me Twice' will be more successful than the invasion of Iraq.

After the events of 9/11 the Southern saying 'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me' does not seem true anymore. It matters less whether Iran is supporting the insurgents or not. For now Iran should get in line if they know what is good for them.

Love Don't Cost a Thing

The true measure of love is not how much you are willing to spend on your loved one's but how much you are willing to sacrifice.

As we celebrate Valentine's with our loved one's, it's not the expensive meals or gifts we give out that matter. It's the sacrifices that we make for our loved one's that count. No doubt, people appreciate an expensive meal and presents but the best memories are not made of material possessions.

With Valentine's day shopping fast catching up with Christmas shopping, it goes to show how materialistic our expression of love has become. On the other hand, breakdown in relationships are on the increase because the basis of most relationships is not sacrifice but the benefits.

The true cost of a relationship is not how much money you spend in it, but how much of yourself you sacrifice. The less the cost of our relationship's, the less likely the relationship will stand the test of time.

Love don't cost a dime!

Much Ado About Something

When you go to Best Buy and purchase electronics using your Best Buy store credit card, you are expected to pay the balance or make a minimum payment when the note is due. Imagine shopping at Best Buy every month and increasing the credit limit on your store credit card while making minimum payments when your note is due. Sooner rather than later you will have to pay-off the full balance to clear the note. It doesn't make sense to continue increasing your balance and credit limit month after month.

Well, that is what is happening between the US and China. The balance of trade between these two countries continues to grow in favor of the Chinese. Like a spoilt child the US continues to feed on Chinese candy. On the other hand, China reserves have ballooned to almost $1 trillion dollars thanks to their fast growing economy propelled by the US trade imbalance. Couple this to the ever increasing US budget deficit funded by sale of Treasury bonds to foreign investors and you have an unprecedented situation facing the US economy.

Sooner or later, something has to give way. Like in the case of the increasing credit card balance, Uncle Sam will at some point have to take measures to reduce or eliminate its unfavorable balance of trade.

Google Inc; Best Place to Work and Live

There's no such thing as a free lunch, certainly not in Googleplex, Mountain View, California.

Fortune magazine voted the 'King of Search Engines', the best company to work for in 2007. No big deal for other companies that have made it to the list of 'Top 100 Best Companies' except that Google shot straight to the top on its first appearance.

At Googleplex you can do your laundry, drop off your dry cleaning, get an oil change or have your car washed, work out in the gym or attend subsidized exercise classes, get a massage, study Mandarin, Japanese, or French, attend a weekly TGIF party, get haircuts and also ask a concierge to arrange dinner reservations. In addition they have swimming pools/spas, Wi-Fi-enabled commuter buses, on-site bike services, gourmet cafeterias, snack rooms, free doctors on-site and beach volleyball.

You'd think that with all these freebies there's very little work that goes on in Google. On the the contrary, the idea behind all these amenities is to get employees to spend more time at work. Arriving to work late, leaving work early, spacing out and running errands during 'lunch' constitutes a chunk of the 2 hrs employees waste every day when they should be working. Google's plan is to ensure that employees get to spend more time at work than they normally would. They have brought a whole new meaning to the term 'working-from-home' by bringing the home to work. Instead, employees can 'live' at Googleplex doing work.

I would not be surprised if Google went a step further and encouraged it's employees to bring their family members to work. Other amenities that they could provide include a church, valet parking, a Walmart/Target Super-center, wedding services, honeymoon suite, Cinemaplex and a hospital complete with emergency and maternity services.

This would truly make Googleplex one of the best places to live in the 2007. Home away from work! Who needs a home when they can work for Google?

Next time your manager offers you 'free lunch', go ahead and ask what they want you to do.

Get Paid for Doing Nothing

Secretary Mike Johanns,
Honorable Secretary of Agriculture,
United States Department of Agriculture.

Dear Honorable Secretary:

My friend, Ed Peterson, over at Wells, Iowa, received a check for $1,000 from the government for not raising hogs. So I want to go into the "not raising hogs" business.

What I want to know is, in your opinion, what is the best kind of farm not to raise hogs on and what is the best breed of hogs not to raise? I want to be sure that I approach this endeavor in keeping with all governmental policies. I would prefer not to raise razorbacks, but if that is not a good breed not to raise, then I would just as gladly not raise Yorkshires or Durocs.

As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be in keeping an accurate inventory of how many hogs I haven't raised.

My friend, Peterson, is very joyful about the future of the business. He has been raising hogs for thirty years or so, and the best he ever made on them was $442 in 1968, until this year when he got your check for $1,000 for not raising hogs.

If I get $1,000 for not raising 50 hogs, will I get $2,000 for not raising 100 hogs? I plan to operate on a small scale at first, holding myself down to about 4,000 hogs not raised, which will mean about $80,000 the first year. Then I can afford a Ford Expedition Limited EL.

Now another thing. These hogs I will not be raising will not eat 100,000 bushels of corn. I understand that you also pay farmers for not raising corn and wheat. Will I qualify for payments for not raising wheat and corn not to feed the 4,000 hogs I am not going to raise? I want to get started as soon as possible as this seems to be a good time of the year not to raise hogs and grain.

Also, I am considering the "not milking cows" business, so send me any information on that too. In view of these circumstances, you understand that I will be totally unemployed and plan to file for unemployment and food stamps.


Patriotically yours,
Harry Callahan

P.S. Would you please notify me when you plan to distribute more free cheese?



Adopted from The Washington Times

China is the New Sheriff in Africa

Hot on the heels after last years Beijing Summit of the Forum on China-Africa Cooperation (FOCAC), is Chinese President Hu Jintao's eight-nation African tour intended to boost Chinese investment in Africa. Clearly, the need for oil and other resources has increased China's involvement in Africa in a bid to secure resources for its fast growing economy. Similar to the European colonization and subsequent industrialization in the early 1900's, China is making infrastructural investments in Africa for the sole purpose of extracting and transporting the raw materials for shipment to China.

For African nations, crippled with high unemployment and poverty, their leaders would rather benefit themselves by pocketing the loans and grants their countries receive from China in return for unrestricted access to their resources. Instead of building their own manufacturing industries to exploit the vast resources that can be found in the continent, African governments are willing to sell their exports cheaply in return for importing finished goods from China at the expense of their weakened economies. It's no wonder that African countries are turning to China, because this relationship benefits the officials more than the relationships they had with their former colonial masters.

On the other hand, the Chinese are happy to 'work' with these governments, regardless of any atrocities/violations that are being committed, to ensure that they get their share of resources such that they are protecting despotic regimes. A good example is China's intervention against the UN's attempt to stop the genocide in Dafur in return for access to oil reserves in Sudan. The Chinese have been quick to defend themselves against accusations of exploitation and neo-colonization in Africa. During last years seven-nation Africa tour, Chinese premier stated that "China adheres to the principles of equality, mutual benefit and non-interference in countries' internal affairs".

What is certain, is that Africa will not achieve it's potential and will be stripped bare by foreigners who's only aim of doing business in Africa is the exploitation of the vast natural resources in return for a market of their manufactured goods. For now, only the elites will benefit from this new found relationship at the expense of their own people consigned to live in poverty.

For Africans, until their governments take charge of their own affairs, it matters less who is in-charge. East or West, their woes are far from over.

Boston, We have a problem!

Trigger happy BPD meets trickier hippie jokers. The result. Mayhem in Boston resulting in a gridlocked city.

Its about time that US law enforcement stopped abusing the powers bestowed onto them in the name of security. Quick thinking would have saved the city of Boston from the mayhem they experienced.

How uptight can the police get? These Aqua Teen Hunger Force electronic boards were placed in several US cities without any incidents. The Boston Police Department messed big time and should take the blame for their 'stupidity'.

Now You Can Lend Money to Strangers

The internet is a world of possibilities. With one click you can now lend money to strangers and earn interest. Chris Larsen, the founder of E-loan, is the brains behind this new phenomenon of social lending. While on the surface it looks risky, the default rate stands at less than 1% so far. By lending small amounts to many borrowers, the lender is able to minimise the risk of losing their money from defaulters. With the proliferation of online banking, the traditional brick and mortar banks have started to build a strong online presence. Just this week Citigroup bought Egg, the worlds largest online bank, in addition to starting an online retail banking arm last year.

Other than to deposit the odd check that I get now and then, I can't remember the last time I walked to a teller in the bank. If this trend is to continue, I fail to understand why banks are still opening up new branches especially in the US. I can bet that a few years from now, they will be closing down these branches in favour of smaller banking outlets that are common in supermarkets.

Next time your kin or kith asks you for a loan (that they will not repay), you know where to send them.